20+ sources of depression and happiness

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The main mission of the Institute of Change Leaders is to support leaders – as well as their companies – to grow.

One of the areas we are working on is mentality and emotions. Without taking care of ourselves, we will not have enough energy to implement ambitious plans. We must have inner strength, we must know how to deal with difficult emotions so that they do not dominate, overwhelm or draw you in.

That is why, at the Institute for Change Leaders, we set ourselves the goal of psychological prophylaxis. Our vision is to support 10,000 people in the coming years, so that they can mentally strengthen themselves, organize themselves internally, so that they do not run out of life energy to work creatively and to implement their plans.

Therefore, we will once again educate you on the topic of burnout, torpor, and depression. Since 2006, I have worked a total of over 1000 hours with people suffering from depression, mild or severe depressive states, as well as with people who experienced burnout in life, occupational burnout and apathy.

Many of them are real, well-paid professionals, managers and entrepreneurs.

Unfortunately, even happy, successful people, who enjoy healthy families and have great relationships with people, can also experience depression.

So what can we do to prevent it from affecting us or our loved ones “ the disease of the 21st century”?

Let’s check what are the causes of this ailment and why it affects not only board members of large companies earning over PLN 100,000 a month, but also children aged 10?

Working with many companies, business owners and dozens of individuals, I systematically observe that the topic of depression has ceased to be a problem only for the few people who are lost in life and have experienced severe trauma.

Depressive states or even complete depression can unexpectedly affect wealthy and – interestingly – happy people. And those who have families and those who choose to live as a free bird to enjoy life.

Working with people since 2006, I still organize this knowledge and verify the possibilities of applying it in practice. Here are my observations on this matter.

Why am I bringing up the topic of depression?
Depression and burnout
My depression
The problem of depression in the world and in the media
Changes in the world and depression
What is depression according to the Change Value Process
Bugs in the process of depression
What are the sources of depression – 20 contributing sources
What are the sources of happiness? How to cure depression? – 20 causes and sources
Levels of happiness

Why am I bringing up the topic of depression?

Because I am concerned about the emotional state of many people I meet on my way.

Because I am concerned about the constant reports and news from the media (a few paragraphs below).

Because one of the goals of my consulting and coaching work in the field of business leadership is to show the way to create healthy organizations, managed by healthy people who maintain a balance between intensive work and inner peace.

Because when working with business I always talk about the so-called Inner Leadership, or working on yourself as a human being to become a better leader.

For this to be possible, we need a lot of energy, endurance and resilience. Such internal batteries that will give us energy to go through big business challenges. The pressure of time and money can be overwhelming in business.

Therefore, discovering 20+ sources of depression and happiness is for business people, leaders and leaders to discover the 20+ sources of energy they need for challenges. I meet too many extraordinary, wise and creative people who get depressed at different levels. Therefore, I strongly believe that every business leader should take this article as a personal foundation of leadership.

At the same time, I believe that at least 60% of what is included in the list of 20+ sources of depression and happiness should be taught at school, we should be taught by our parents. Building the foundations for our psyche is the most important goal of education until the age of 20-30.

In reports on the future, a lot is said about competences such as: cooperation, analytical thinking, communication, creativity, openness to changes and quick learning of new things. However, it is forgotten that in order to be able to do all this, we must be mentally strong, resilient and feel good about ourselves.

I believe that everyone should understand the 20+ sources of depression and 20+ sources of happiness that I write about in this article.

It is necessary for a healthy and good life.
It is also necessary for every entrepreneur and leader to have the energy to run a business.

The crisis can hit anyone.

Even if you don’t experience depression in its fullest form, which lasts for many months, a disorder in several of the 20+ sources of depression and happiness can take away the strength and power to face life’s challenges.

I raise these topics at least once a year so that we remember that nothing is given to us for the rest of our lives, and in order to live well and with dignity, we need to constantly care for it.

This time I show 20+ specific reasons that cause depression and therefore 20+ ways out of it.

In the media, we mainly hear about statistics, overcrowded therapy rooms. There is a lot of talk about what depression is and how to recognize it: constant low moods, lack of strength to act, inability to enjoy even things that were previously a source of joy for us, sleep disturbances, sense of meaninglessness in life, inability to perform the simplest steps.

There is not enough talk about what exactly these states affect and how to get out of them. There are no easy solutions to it, because every person is different and has the right reasons for falling into a depressed state. 20+ sources of depression and 20+ sources of happiness are the basis for finding it for yourself.

If, after reading, you find this article important, please share it with your relatives and friends. Let’s prevent depression from becoming the bane of people of all ages. Let us take care of ourselves, let us take care of our loved ones.

Depression and burnout

Last year I created and made available a free online test, which is to help capture the moment of life burnout at an early stage, the level of energy decline and support in taking care of factors that affect our emotional life: https://adamdebowski.pl/test -burning /

Many depressions begin with professional and life burnout and worse moods. Although surprisingly, for many this is not the only cause. If we want to have good careers, prospering businesses, a good own and family life, one of our priorities must be to take care of ourselves and our emotions. Even if we feel bulletproof, happy, rich internally and materially, we need to keep 40 negative factors of burnout as low as possible and 40 positive factors as high as possible.

Disturbances in 40 burnout factors can result in a lack of motivation, a lack of energy to work, or burnout. If this disorder lasts too long (over 3-6-12 months) and there are depressive factors (more on which below) then, unfortunately, a person may experience severe depressive states.

My hard times

I have had depressive episodes three times in my life. Fortunately, these were not difficult months of several months. But I had symptoms that are depressive elements.

I have experienced a strong drop in mood, a lack of sense of purpose, a lack of strength to get out of bed. For 3-10 days or 3-5 weeks, I felt suspended, withdrawn, afraid of taking action.

Due to the fact that I knew or discovered how to deal with it, I recovered quite quickly from these states. Although, with several weeks of trials, I did not feel that it was short-lived. Those weeks went on and on…

The heaps of emotions were sometimes hard to bear.

It was then that I started to create my own model, a way to ensure that such states never come back. My previous knowledge, independent work and support of my relatives allowed me to come out of these difficult moments unscathed.

According to this approach, I work with people who come to me and are unable to cope with their deep emotions on their own.

The problem of depression in the world and in the media

Depression, according to WHO (International Health Organization), has for years been one of the biggest problems in the world.

Let’s take a look at what the media is saying.

Onet.pl says:

The report of the Empowering Children Foundation, presented a few months ago, shows that every 10 teenagers has attempted suicide. Children and adolescents with depression, anxiety and eating disorders, addicted to the Internet, pornography and multimedia come to psychologists and therapists.

[…] Today, pedagogical and psychological counseling centers are overloaded with work. People, rooms and halls are missing all the time. It takes several months for an appointment. In the clinic in Wołomin it is four months, in Legionowo in January it was possible to sign up for April, and one of the clinics in Warsaw gave the term “in six months”. We are only talking about the diagnosis. Therapy is a completely different matter, you have to wait for it until space becomes available for a child to finish the therapy. This can take anywhere from a few months to over a year.

[…] There are teenagers with graduation crises. Children come and cry because their parents pressure them with good grades and exemplary behavior. They do not feel relaxed because they are immediately taken from school to additional classes. There are more and more young people with various fears, and the parents, instead of talking to the child, send them to a psychologist who, with the touch of a magic wand, is to fix them and get them back on their feet. They are often kids with severe depression that developed over a long period of time and whose symptoms were not noticed by anybody, parents, teachers or the school psychologist.

Source: https://kobieta.onet.pl/zdrowie/stoimy-w-obliczu-katastrofy-jesli-chodzi-o -our-children’s-mental-health / tm9xyd8

Outriders says:

More than eight out of ten teachers say the mental health of English students has deteriorated since 2017 Anxiety, self-harm, post-traumatic stress disorder and suicide are more common among children and adolescents. Teachers pay attention to the growing level of stress among students, most often associated with the pressure of examination results and the family situation. At the same time, financial outlays for the educational system in Great Britain and support for young people in need of help are decreasing. 8,600 school workers: principals, teachers and social workers took part in the survey.

Source: https://outride.rs/en/ w Outriders Brief nr. 64

Outriders says

The philosopher Jean Baudrillard calls social media activity “blurring of real life, which inevitably leads to indifference.” Digital life is just fantasies provided to us by intermediaries. We are looking for someone on the Internet who we want to be, but we will never find him. We blur ourselves when we watch others, and at the same time we can be many people at the same time on many communication platforms. There are so many ways to live online that we don’t really need to be ourselves anymore. And it is this confusion that destroys us, causes loneliness, confusion and depression.

Source: https://outride.rs/en/ w Outriders Brief nr. 61

Changes in the world and depression

The truth is that our psyche is not adapted to this day.

In the last 10-50 years, the leap in the way we work has been gigantic. The number of people working mentally, conceptually, abstractly is significant. This puts a heavy burden on the human psyche.

In the past, when people were working physically in the field or in the factory, their thoughts were not very much involved. Now, more and more professions require analysis, decision making, communication, collaboration and anticipation.

We don’t realize how much energy this costs our brain. The number of things we have to deal with is greater.

In the past, management boards were responsible for decisions. Now, decision-making is also left in the hands of the rank and file, who, because they are specialists, often have more knowledge than their superiors.

Further changes concern the issue of comparing ourselves. In the past, at school or at work, we compared only 10-30 people in the classroom, in the office.

Now? We have Facebook, Instagram, Musica.ly and we have hundreds of thousands of people that we can snoop on and watch. We used to be able to pretend in front of our friends that we were on a great vacation. There were no portals, cells, and even once … cameras.

Now, to show off, you have to actually leave, because otherwise we will not upload photos on Facebook … or use the latest technology, thanks to which we can make it easier and easier, without knowing Photoshop, to prepare a photo to put our face on selected picture.

What for? In order to be able to show off. We used to be able to brag if we could lie well and tell vacation stories that we had not experienced. We are now able to produce hard evidence.

Someone will say: don’t compare yourself. Easy to say. For 99% of society not comparing, not judging yourself and others is the highest level of awareness development. It takes many years of mental, psychological, spiritual, meditative and mindfulness practice to be able to limit the mechanism of comparing oneself.

Another extremely difficult mechanism is information overload. There used to be school or work. You came home and there were possibly a few channels on TV.

Now, in the toilet, on the bus, on the couch, we have access to dozens of information portals, social networks and VOD portals. The number of stimuli that passes through our nervous system is huge. Therefore, in some places around the world, e.g. in the Silicon Valley, some organizations prohibit the use of tablets and mobile phones up to the age of 10.

There was a time when the world could be clearly explained. The church played an enormously important role in explaining its principles to the people. Over the years, however, as people moved away more and more from the church, they also moved away from the worldview that was passed on there. Extremely important and difficult questions for humans: Why does the world exist? Where are we from? What’s after death? What is good and what is bad? have begun to go unanswered for some people.

Without answers to these questions, we can function for several or several years. However, at some point, these questions come to us again. Can we answer them if we do not have a doctrine to answer them? If so, great. If not, then trouble begins. The psyche begins to lose, wander, and this can become one of the sources of depression.

A long time ago, in the so-called world 1.0 everything was clear: you are 8-10 years old, you help your family in the field or in a sawmill, for example.

With world 2.0 there was a revolution, but still everything was simple. The path of our life was quite understandable: first elementary school, then vocational school, technical or high school, then work or studies, and then work. And so until the age of 65. Simple, clear, orderly.

The 21st century brought the world of 3.0 where anything is possible and nothing is clear. Once upon a time there was no such freedom, but there was security and predictability. Now there is freedom, but there is no predictability and security.

The level of uncertainty and possibility is enormous. And for this our psyche is not so prepared. Uncertainty combined with the number of choices is sometimes so aggravating that this fact alone is one of the main foundations for states of depression, states of strong sadness and fear.

All this has happened in the last 10-20 years. The brain has evolved over hundreds of thousands of years. Now he can’t keep up. Of course, we as humans can adapt to change. But not always and not so quickly. We can deal with all this, but only on the condition that we pay attention to the essential elements that make up the foundations of our psyche.

What is depression according to the Change Value Process

Change Value Process is my original methodology for working on change. It includes both the approach needed to manage change in business, as well as aspects of working on yourself, your CEMKs (features, emotions, mentality, competences). One of the important areas of CVP is Inner Leadership – that is, working deeper on yourself, understanding yourself, your personality.

In CVP, I always try to describe incomprehensible phenomena in order to clarify non-obvious mechanisms, to understand the complex human nature.

Depression according to CVP is a deep psychological and spiritual sadness that results from a deep sense of lack, emptiness, insecurity and confusion. Depression is also a feeling of suffering that comes from not getting what we wanted in life. Thus, depression can be defined as psychological and spiritual suffering. The deepest level of depression is the subconscious fear of decisions, actions, work and life.

So we have three dimensions of depression: deep sadness, suffering, fear.

This is at the root of depression, but the problem is that most people are unable to notice it. The tangible effect, visible to a human being, is a sense of meaninglessness, lack of energy, lack of willingness to perform even the simplest activities.

Looking holistically, from the spiritual dimension, we can say that depression is the result of straying from your life path, it is the result of living for a long time in disagreement with yourself, your values and (if you believe it) with your spiritual path (depending on faith: a spiritual path determined by God, fate, destiny, soul or ourselves).

CVP depression has 6 levels of depth, 6 levels of advancement. There are a minimum of 20 specific sources, causes of depression, and they are often interrelated. Depression is usually the result of emotions and thoughts accumulated in a person, which have been hidden for years in the so-called shadow, that is, they were repressed or suppressed. The sources don’t have to be traumatic or very strong. It can be a combination of many small, imperceptible elements that have become crucial for the human subconscious over the years.

I call depression a deep sadness of the soul and subconsciousness of man.

Depression on the level 1-6 is a pain in the soul, it is a deep sadness of the soul that results from a strong deviation from the course of your life, from losing key aspects of yourself as a human being, from forgetting what is most important to us.

On the 6th level, we can, unfortunately, still deal with neurological and biological disorders. The causes are then not strictly psychological or spiritual, but medical. However, most depressive states and major depression have their origins in the psyche, emotions and thoughts.

By reversing 20 sources of depression, we get 20 sources of human happiness, that is, a feeling of deep and sustained joy, peace and trust. About this in the last part of the article.

To deal with depression, you should follow the rules outlined in this article. When we experience level 3, 4, 5, 6 depression (see explanation below), unfortunately we often cannot cope on our own.

Conscious people, with psychological methods, with depth coaching methods are able to work with themselves – up to level 3 inclusive. But there is always a moment when we need support. At the beginning of relatives, but from level 3-4, we have to use the help of a therapist, psychologist or coach who works with the methods of depth coaching, integral coaching, i.e. combines coaching with psychological and therapeutic knowledge and practice.

Before we get into the 20 sources of depression and happiness, let’s take a look at the levels of depression.

Based on my knowledge and experience in CVP, I distinguish 6 levels of depression:

1. Drop of moods and stress

It’s not really depression, it’s just mood swings that depend on the day, difficult meeting, challenging project, or fatigue.

So why do I distinguish this as level 1? Many people use phrases like “I’m depressed”, “I’m depressed” and I want to point out that this is the 1st level that may or may not worsen and become depressed. This the level of most people today has. Rush, pressure, work, competition, money, constant changes cause constant tension. Micro voltage. Sometimes it is even imperceptible.

In Level 1 it is crucial that

rest
eat well
play sports
have a close person and / or mentor, coach, counselor, therapist with whom you can honestly discuss current events, emotions, thoughts, so as not to suppress tensions
take care of the basic elements of the “present” area (below)

2. Lack of motivation and energy to act

At this level, getting enough sleep or avoiding stressful meetings and projects is not enough. On the 2nd level, a person experiences the feeling that they do not want to take up challenges. Such a state may result from a professional failure, a loss in an important competition. This state may pass after a few days or we can deal with it using appropriate methods within a few days. If this does not happen, the state may progress to Level 3. Level 2 may be to experience episodes lasting a few days or weeks. Later, we often come back to life, positive energy. If level 2 lasts more than a month, it may unfortunately move to level 3.

In level 2 it is crucial that

draw appropriate conclusions from current and recent events
have a close person and / or mentor, coach, counselor, therapist with whom you can honestly discuss current events, emotions, thoughts, so as not to suppress tensions
take care of deeper, more important than before elements in the area of ”present” (below)
take care of the basic elements of the “past” and “future”

3. Strong tensions and accumulation of negative thoughts and emotions

Here we deal with more serious emotions. The result is a state in which we feel down, depressed, without energy, even if we win the competition, get a bonus, or have a baby. Accumulated, unworked thoughts and emotions create a growing tension that is hard to understand. One day a person feels good, the next one experiences a strong tension. He can sometimes motivate himself to go out, to talk, to meet, but it costs him a lot of energy. This level may be maintained for 2-4 months. Most often it takes the form of a 3-month depressive period. After this time, the body and mind of many people regenerate and strengthen on their own. There is one condition: we must take care of ourselves, talk to our relatives, and preferably with a therapist, depth coach, psychologist. If we don’t, then we can experience the sensations of level 4 or, unfortunately, enter level 4.

In level 3 it is crucial that

start working on the key elements in the areas “past”, “present”, “future”
to have a close person of a coach, a therapist with whom you can honestly discuss current events, emotions, thoughts, so as not to suppress tensions

4. Lack of vitality and apathy

Every day is a tough day at this level. Man still has the strength to clean the house, but there is no more energy to work. He cannot mobilize himself. This condition can last for many months, even 1-2 years with periods of improvement. However, an untreated depression, without deep self-work, can take years and, worse, turn into levels 5 and 6.

At level 4 it is crucial that

consult a specialist to understand your condition and start working on the key elements in the areas of “past”, “present”, “future”
have a close person with whom you can honestly discuss current events, emotions, thoughts, so as not to suppress tensions

5. Severe depression

This is the period when psychological work is not enough or even sometimes impossible. The person is so withdrawn, weakened that any conversation is too much effort for the mind and body. In this state, he doesn’t even think. There is a suspension, a stuck. There are times during the day when you gain strength to eat and wash yourself. Sometimes there are better days that allow for a conversation and psychological work. Often, without the support of a psychiatrist who prescribes the right drugs, the body and mind may not be able to cope.

At level 5, it is crucial that

consult a specialist to understand your condition and start working on the key elements in the areas of “past”, “present”, “future”
have a close person that you just will. You don’t need to talk. You have to feel that you are not alone
to decide if we are taking medications, drugs from a psychiatrist – sometimes it’s the only way to strengthen ourselves mentally and be able to continue working on ourselves therapeutically
accept it takes weeks or months to recover and work through its sources so that depression does not recur

6. Clinical depression

This is the most severe condition and is the result of an ongoing level 5 depression or, unfortunately most often, a neurological-biological disorder. At level 6, without pharmacology, a person is unable to get out of bed, wash himself, and even go to the toilet. Disturbances in the brain can arise as a result of years of level 5 depression. Strong negative emotions that last for years can cause changes in the nervous system. full health, although it may actually be very difficult to achieve for some people. After recovering from level 6 depression, he will have to be mindful for a large part of his life, taking care of many elements so that the depression does not return. But I always have faith that we are able to come out of the most extreme states.

At level 6, it is crucial that

consult a specialist to understand your condition and start working on the key elements in the areas of “past”, “present”, “future”
have a close person that you just will. You don’t need to talk. You have to feel that you are not alone
use medications, medications from a psychiatrist – sometimes this is the only way to strengthen yourself mentally and be able to continue working on yourself therapeutically
accept that it takes months, if not years, to recover and work through its sources so that depression does not recur
accept and understand that there is a scenario in which it turns out that the severity is true because of biological problems. Perhaps for many years you will not be able to recover fully and you should constantly look for solutions, support and not succumb to this disease.

I have met people on my way who experienced level 4, 5 and 6 depression in their lives.

Neither the therapy nor the medications helped. They stabilized their condition for several months, but never solved the problem until the individual moment of their discovery. These people told about several directions that helped. These are the subjective discoveries of these people. Some of them are my clients, some are people who have found other experts who helped them.

Two of my old friends told me that they found peace in their lives through faith. One of them in the Catholic faith. Trusting God, the teachings of the church allowed him to sort out everything that was previously the source of depression. The other found release in the Buddhist faith, and more in the principles of Buddhism and Taoism.

The third person was my business client who worked with me two years ago to better manage the company and people. In the course of our work, we went down to the topics of business decisions. It turned out that he had not made some of the decisions for years because he was depressed. He carefully hid it and took medication for 3 years. It was a level 3-4 depression, he had moments at level 5. When we delved into the history of his company and the genesis of his father’s founding and his relationship with his father, then there was the process of releasing and healing – as he called it, healing the soul. He began to live his life, not that of his father. It was an amazing experience.

The fourth person is also my client t from a few months ago. His depression kept coming back every year for several years. Every year there was an improvement, but something kept coming back. As if he was digging into something important every year, he was discovering successive layers of springs, but he was unable to touch the essence. Finally, 3 months ago, we discovered a source that appears to be a key foundation. On the one hand, this is an example where depression may recur every year. On the other hand, depression doesn’t go away until we know the full truth. As the client said, each year of depression and each end of the depression period was for him a school of life, like entering a higher level of self-awareness.

The fifth person is a friend of my close friend , who was freed from depression by working with a therapist, whom she found after many searches. As she said, she visited 10 specialists, but none of them could find her. Only the eleventh therapist was the one who could understand her. It is a business woman. Concrete, elegant, extroverted. She is not an easy player in business and thus has not been an easy patient.

She always thought she knew better. She always analyzed everyone’s every move, including the therapist. She has always been self-sufficient. She never asked for help. When depression hit her, it was like hitting a truck and lightning. Sudden and painful, surprising and incomprehensible. Looking from a distance, the search for this 11 expert was not the search for the therapist, but the search for her and the process of self-discovery.

Of course, what a specialist says and does is important, but she also had to mature and understand. How did she find peace and inner joy after 2 years? By finding and accepting what she never understood and never wanted. She has always been independent, fast, confident, active, focused. She did not accept help, peace, insecurity, stability, ease and freedom. The source of her recovery from depression was to work to discover what she hadn’t known for much of her life. She had been a commando and general all her life, and had never been a surfer in Hawaii. She trusted herself mainly, she couldn’t trust others and life.

Bugs in the depression process

When a person experiences a depression level of 3-6, they often start looking blindly for help, either on their own or with their family. Sometimes the family does it for him. What are the most common errors:

a mistake that cannot be reversed when you are on the level 4-6 is the fact that you have not worked with yourself before, did not recognize yourself, did not try to develop yourself, explore at a deeper level. We will not turn back time, but we can start working on ourselves, on getting to know ourselves and the causes of stress, apathy or depression. . Depression is the result of major or subtle neglect in your emotional and mental life. The best medicine is prevention. However, if it is too late, remember that we will not reverse what was in the past, but we can create a new future.
not accepting the weaknesses and help of others. Some have built such an armor in their lives that, despite the difficulties, they will not allow anyone to their emotions. They do not accept the fact that they are weaker, that they are not coping. They will not accept help because they will think that they are weak then. It’s hard to call it a mistake. For many, it is a belief system on which they have built their entire lives, their independence, and their successes. If they don’t let it go, the depression process will go on.
depression is demonized. In the past, left-handedness was considered an illness and homosexuality was considered a mental illness. Today, depression is still regarded by many as a taboo subject, as something strange and incomprehensible. And in fact, depression on the level 1-5 is a pain of the soul, it is a deep sadness of the soul that results from a strong deviation from the course of your life, from losing key aspects of yourself as a human being, from forgetting what is most important to us.
it is believed that depression can be “dealt with” by anti-stress techniques, positive thinking, coaching methods, and thought control. Of course, the fact is that any of these things can help, especially if you’re dealing with a depression level of 1-2. But if the depression does not go away, you need to look deeper. On the other hand, it is believed that in order to deal with depression, only drugs and only long-term therapy based on digging through the past and traumas can help. This is the other extreme which is not 100% true. There are people who will need it, but if you look at the list of 20+ sources of depression you will understand how many aspects can influence depressive states.
you go straight to a psychiatrist for pills. Remember that a psychiatrist is not a therapist, he is a medical doctor who knows the body and biology, but will not support you psychologically. Unless he is a psychiatrist and a therapist at the same time. If we want to get a pill to improve the mood, that’s OK, although the pills often have side effects. The fact that someone goes to a psychiatrist does not mean that he or she begins the process of treatment, change. Often people count on going to a psychiatrist to fix the problem.
people experiencing level 1-3 depression often reach for tablets straight away. They do not go to a psychology, therapist, depth coach, they do not work on themselves, but they go to a psychiatrist who will not support you emotionally, but will support you medically. Some psychiatrists do not even mention to the incoming that it is worth seeing a psychological specialist, they just write a prescription. Sometimes this is what the patient expects, but often he does not know what is happening to him and then the lack of psychological consultations is a big mistake. Drugs don’t deal with levels 1-4 or even 5 for depression. They can be helpful, can often be very supportive, but they are not a solution, they will not cure the cause.
People with levels 1-4 of depression can, unfortunately, cope with it through alcohol or drugs. This is the fastest way to get addicted. Even at level 1, i.e. with stronger stress, if we drink beer, whiskey or smoke marijuana 1-3 times a week, we can make ourselves addicted. The pleasure, relaxation that comes after even a small dose of alcohol makes the body want more.
a person with depression counts on it to get over it. He cannot distinguish between a weaker day and a deeper state of depression. She waits for days, weeks for her condition to get better. Sometimes, even after 2-3 months, it still displaces the fact that it is going through something harder.
family, loved ones pat their backs, keep their fingers crossed to improve and expect us to mobilize
psychological work is about talking about current feelings – some psychologists and therapists are taught that therapy is 100% listening, talking about current feelings and emotions. Some specialists mainly seek to understand the causes in the past. It is assumed that understanding the causes frees you from the problem. This is all true, but only partially. Keeping your emotions “ventilated” and understanding the past is extremely important. But it is not everything.

That’s why I invite you to learn about 20+ sources of depression, and thus 20+ sources of human happiness.

This will help you understand what depression is all about, and the opposite: true happiness.

It is not a complete knowledge, because each of the points could be described on many pages. The purpose of presenting the sources below is to highlight the key elements that should become an inspiration for further work on yourself and with yourself.

What are the sources of depression? What causes depression? – 20 reasons

To help understand the causes of depression (and then happiness), let’s look at 3 areas: human past, present, future.

In each area, I present a few elements that are the concrete cause of what we feel and experience every day.

Depression may originate from only one of the following aspects, but most often it is a combination of at least 3-4 elements that are not easy to understand and name at first. Not every element applies to everyone. Not everyone has to be important to us.

This is a list of universal topics that I have been working on in my life and in the lives of my clients since 2006.

To sum up, I believe that depression, which does not result from biological (hormonal, neurological) disorders and is psychological originates from emotions and thoughts that cause

we do not accept essential elements in our life (we do not accept work, failure, our children’s choices)
we do not allow ourselves to fulfill our needs, desires, dreams and we suppress them
we do not allow ourselves what other, new variables (e.g. we do not allow a job change, we do not allow the death of a loved one)
we accumulate in ourselves and do not let go incl. anger, anger, past, failure
we don’t understand and we don’t try to understand ourselves, life, other people sufficiently

All this creates the so-called shadow, i.e. the subconscious cellar in which everything else, uncomfortable lands on the shelves, in the recesses of our mind.

We create our life’s taboos. Importantly – they do not have to be great, traumatic experiences. Initially, they can be small, medium-small, unnoticeable at first glance aspects of our life.

When these nuances are not caught, they can start to bud like yeast. When they start to bud and we still don’t see them, they will overflow and give rise to the depression we feel physically. The fact is that it started a long time ago.

Sources of depression in the past

Accumulated emotions from the past
1. fear / anxiety / fears, anger, hurt, guilt, regret, shame
Disordered past events
Undisclosed, unworked family taboos
Undisclosed, untreated personal taboos
Suppressed and unrealized dreams, desires, needs and / or regrets, anger resulting from not realizing them
Sense for a long time in life
1. nonsense
2. feeling inferior and underestimated
3. failure, no achievement
4. failure to accept failures, mistakes
5. criticism from others
6. inability to accept judgment, criticism from others
7. non-acceptance of criticism, feedback from others
No implementation of the so-called universal needs, i.e.
1. lack of a sense of control and influence
2. not accepting a lack of a sense of control and influence
3. lack of closeness from loved ones
4. no sense of belonging, connected with others
5. lack of self-esteem
6. no sense of development
7. meaningless in life
8. insecurity
Inconsistency with personality
1. e.g. extroverted work for years being an introverted personality
2. e.g. introverted work for years being an extroverted personality
Inconsistency with values 
1. doing things in life, at work that are against our moral backbone
You will not achieve or receive from life what you wanted and expected.
1. Feeling that you had to give up your plans, goals, and dreams in favor of someone or something.

The origins of depression in the present

Lack of acceptance of yourself and your life
1. an excess of ambitions that constantly create a sense of lack of goals and dissatisfaction
2. too much pressure from outside – “you have to x”, “you have to y”
3. comparing ourselves with others and feeling that we are still not good enough, that others are better
4. perfectionism, extreme striving to improve everything you do and not accepting current achievements, standards
5. overcontrol. Controlling yourself, others. Living with fears and the need to keep your finger on the pulse over and over again.
Work pace
1. too many meetings
2. not getting enough sleep
3. too many decisions to be made
Cumulative negative thoughts (winding up every day)
1. internal criticism – self-criticism
2. external criticism – criticism of others, the world
3. experiencing criticism from others, inability to accept judgment from others
4. lack of being listened to by relatives and “venting” current thoughts and emotions
Internal conflicts
1. between own desires and family expectations
2. between own values and personal beliefs
3. between present and expected work
Lack of proper care for the body, among others
1. poor level of vitamins D, K2, Omega, C,
2. lack of physical activity
3. endocrine disrupted
4. inadequate functioning of the nervous system, neurotransmitters
5. no contact with the sun, no exposure to the sun for a long time
No taking responsibility- withdrawing from life, shifting responsibility onto the family, onto others. Not taking responsibility for:
1. myself
2. your life
3. decisions
4. job
No contact with nature
1. e.g. no walks in the woods
2. e.g. no swimming in the lake
Excessive self-centeredness
1. Over-focusing on yourself, your benefits and ignoring the needs of other people.
2. Not helping others, even hurting others.
Spiritual inconsistency
1. conflict between own beliefs about spirituality and family beliefs
2. unclear beliefs about God, spirituality
3. no contact with the spiritual sphere
4. lack of gratitude for what and who you have (for life, for yourself, for health, for family)
Not being here and now
1. lack of time and inability to silence thoughts and be present in “alpha” state
2. constant thinking, over-scrutiny of the past and future, topics and threads in life
Not feeling who you are
1. Inability to answer the questions: What am I? Who am I?
2. lack of subjective sense of self which creates the impression of “I don’t feel good in my skin”, “I don’t feel good in my life”, “I don’t know what I want or need”

Sources of depression in the future

No clear path to the future
1. feeling lost, uncertain, fear for the future “what will I do in the future”
2. uncertainty “how will I handle”
3. fear of “I can’t do it, I can’t”
Over-worrying about your own
1. health
2. finance
Worrying excessively about
1. loved ones
2. health
3. finance
4. home
No clear world order, life, death. Existential questions not answered
1. Why does the world exist?
2. Where are we from?
3. What’s after death?
4. What is good and what is bad?
No trust.
1. to myself
2. to loved ones
3. life.

I wish you to minimize the sources of depression in your life. At the same time, remember that all 20+ sources cannot be worked out in a few days or even months. We can accomplish a lot in a year, but the fact is that the process of recovering from a level 3-4 depression may take as long as 1-2 years. Recovery from level 5-6 depression can take over 2 years.

I write “even” or “maybe” because I always believe that there are people who can do it faster. It is possible. At the same time, it is worth accepting that it is sometimes a few years of work. During this trip, the coming months will bring significant changes. However, the durability of the effects depends on how realistically we will change our lives and our approach to it in the coming months and years. Life says “check” from time to time and you have to put your cards on the table.

At the same time, the time to recover, the time to recover from depression depends heavily on our maturity in life, on the maturity of our self-awareness. In Change Value Process and his book The Wall describes a very important concept in the Stages of Personal Evolution. It says that how we deal with each problem depends on the stage we are at. I am not going to describe the whole concept now, but I would like to point out that there are people who experience depression at levels 1-4 and may hardly notice it. They feel bad and it shows it, but they do not realize that there is a reason and that it is something other than severe fatigue due to lack of sleep …

It is only the crash in life and the experience of a level 5-6 depression that will make them realize that something is wrong. There are also those who understand that they have a problem but will do little. They will complain, complain, but will not seek help. Among them there will be those who will talk to their relatives and even a specialist, but these will be conversations about everyday life, about everyday challenges and emotions. They will be ready for the so-called a classic therapy that is based on a simple (though difficult for them) dialogue about what they are currently experiencing. These are very important conversations. Key for these people. Without it, they won’t go any further. At the same time, this form of work will take 12-36 months. Sometimes it can’t be rushed. Sometimes this is their way.

There are also those who will keep asking “why is this happening to me?” but they won’t look for a solution. There are those who will look for answers, ways of going out, but will not delve into themselves, into their lives enough to make a real difference. It takes many months or years for all these people to start working on themselves, let alone recover from this state. Only those who start looking for solutions and apply certain discoveries in their lives have a chance to win.

The process of getting out and healing is also influenced by our personality, how much patience we have for conversations, taking care of ourselves and how much time we have to spend for ourselves. Our beliefs about working on ourselves are also extremely important. What I wrote about my mistakes, the lack of acceptance of my weakness and the help of others will extend the recovery process. All these variables have a huge impact on how people cope with therapy.

What are the sources of happiness? How is depression treated? How do you get out of depression?

Now let’s reverse 20 sources of depression and see what, from an integral psychology perspective, is the source of happiness. Each of the points requires a subjective view and personal reflection. Everyone is governed by the same laws, but no person is the same. Each of us needs these 20+ elements to be happy, but to different degrees and at different stages of life.

Many people who experience trauma in life from a psychological point of view has grounds to experience depression. At the same time, if he takes care of many of these 20+ sources, he can go straight and find peace and even happiness in life. Summarizing all the points below, a person needs: acceptance, understanding and appreciation of the past, acceptance, understanding and appreciation of the present life and oneself, acceptance, understanding and appreciation of the future.

At the same time, many people (this may seem controversial) will need to experience depression. Not because they had a hard past, but to rediscover and understand themselves. About half of the people I have worked with and those who have experienced depressive or depressive states did not have specific, clearly defined past events. The process of depth therapy and coaching for them was almost like a rebirth process, it was a rediscovery of oneself. Despite the severity of the process, they realized over time that this was for something.

In order not to bring about such moments, it is worth taking care of 20+ factors of happiness – in your life and in the lives of your children. It is not easy, it is not easy. It’s a job for life. But I have a very strong impression that one of our goals in life is to understand this complicated puzzle of 20+ pieces.

CVP happiness levels

Before we move on to 20+ sources of happiness, let’s look at the 6 levels of happiness according to CVP, that is, the levels of depth and the fullness of feeling it. Just as depression has its severity levels, positive feelings also come in different dimensions and levels of intensity.

Pleasure and optimism
1. Pros: positive thinking, good thoughts related to current situations, work, relationships.
2. Risks: we may not necessarily feel a sense of worth and peace here. From time to time, concerns about the future emerge. Unworked emotions from the past also return. The ego traps can arise many times: comparison, over-ambition, hype, amok.
Satisfaction and enthusiasm
1. Pros: feeling satisfied with who you are, what you have and have. Good feelings last longer than level 1.
2. Threats: these emotions depend on the effects we achieve. If results, finances are lacking, positive emotions may subside.
Pride of achievement
1. Pros: deeper levels of satisfaction, a healthy sense of pride and self-worth.
2. Threats: emotions are not as shaky as on level 1-2, but they can still be exposed to ego traps – such as comparison or over-ambition.
A sense of gratitude and joy
1. Pros: sense of deep satisfaction and thus deeper gratitude for life
2. Threats: there are much less threats. The ego begins to quieten down, the emotions of the past are liberated to a tremendous extent. This is where the actual experience of happiness begins. So far, these are moments, moments – shorter or longer. The main threat is the lack of care for everything that has been built so far. We may fall into thinking that everything is now fine and everything is guaranteed. We must remember to always take care of what is important. Nothing is given in advance and forever.
A sense of acceptance and fulfillment
1. Pros: Not only do we experience gratitude, but also a deep sense of what has happened and is happening now.
2. Threats: Does not yet fully accept what could happen. There is sometimes stress resulting from fear for the future, although these are not strong emotions that knock you out.
Complete genuine happiness
1. Pros: a combination of love, fulfillment, peace, acceptance of everything that has happened, is happening and is about to happen. There is release from shadows, blockages, past. The person has fully mastered ego.
2. Threats: It can be said that this level is risk-free because it is the highest level of awareness. Even if there is a disease in life, the death of a loved one, financial problems, a person can cope with it. Since a human being is human, there is a risk of taking a step back to level 5 or 4. But it’s hardly possible to get depressed all of a sudden. The main danger for humans here is the “6th level of happiness delusion”. Many people meditate, go to beautiful islands, to India, entrust their lives to God and experience states of excitement and elation. If they do it shallowly, they have the feeling that they have understood everything, they have complete peace of mind. They reject matter, money, the modern world. They deny capitalism, corporations and anything else that is not a source of peace and happiness. From my perspective, it is a state of “departure”, an unearthed state of “spiritual high” that leads to wrong assessments of myself and my life. Such people feel that they are above the mundane. Then they cannot take care of everyday things. They only look for what gives them pleasure. This is not true Level 6 happiness. It is self-deception, creating a powerful shadow that will be painful.

20 sources of happiness and 20 sources of depression treatment

Sources of happiness in the past

Released emotions from the past
1. released emotions such as fear, anger, hurt, guilt, regret, shame
2. feeling of peace, acceptance, strength instead of the above emotions
Organize past events
Reveal and work through family taboos
Reveal and work through personal taboos
Fulfilling your dreams, desires, needs or accepting not realizing them
Sense for a long time in life
1. make sense of what you were doing
2. appreciation
3. accepting otherness
4. accepting failures, stumbles, mistakes
Implementation of the so-called universal needs, i.e.
1. feeling in control and influencing your life
2. accepting what we have no control
3. feeling of closeness from loved ones
4. sense of belonging, bonding with others
5. sense of worth
6. sense of development
7. sense of meaning in life
8. sense of security
Consistency with the personality
Consistency with values 
Achieving in life what you wanted and expected and / and full acceptance of the lack of realized plans
1. Not feeling like you had to give up your plans, goals and dreams in favor of someone or something.

Sources of happiness in the present

Accepting yourself and your life
1. Feeling satisfied with the goals achieved and acceptance of the lack of achievement of the set goals. Understanding that not everything is influenced.
2. Dealing with outside pressure – “you have to x”, “you should y” – the ability to let go and know the importance of being guided by your principles and not hurting others.
3. Not comparing ourselves with others and feeling that we are good enough, that we do what we have control over and as much as we can. Accepting that others are better. Understanding and feeling what we’re good at.
4. Lack of perfectionism, no acceptance of current achievements, no standards. The ability to grind, learn, and improve while feeling satisfied and grateful for what you have, what you have done.
Adjusting the pace of work
1. enough meetings
2. adequate amount of sleep
3. number of decisions adequate to our abilities to be made
Peace of mind, the ability to control negative thoughts that appear. Not accumulating negative thoughts, not getting yourself turned on each day.
1. self-appreciation, gratitude and elimination of excessive internal criticism
2. the ability to really look at reality, to realistically assess the events in your life
3. real-positive look at the world, no external criticism, no constant criticism of others, the world, the ability to look at the world in a real-positive way
4. being listened to by loved ones and “venting” current thoughts and emotions
Internal consistency, i.e. no internal conflicts
1. between own desires and family expectations
2. between own values and personal beliefs
3. between present and expected work
Adequate care for the body, among others
1. adequate level of vitamins D, K2, Omega, C
2. adequate physical activity
3. adequate hormone levels in the body
4. proper functioning of the nervous system, neurotransmitters
5. being in the sun, contact with nature and the sun
Taking responsibility – not withdrawing from life, taking responsibility for:
1. myself
2. your life
3. decisions
4. job
Healthy self-centeredness
1. Taking care of yourself and taking care of others on a healthy basis
2. Helping others as far as possible and internally consistent
Adequate contact with nature
1. e.g. walks in the woods
2. e.g. swimming in the lake
Consistency with the spiritual realm
1. clear beliefs about spirituality and no strong family conflict on this topic
2. clarity of own beliefs about God, spirituality
3. adequate, coherent contact with the spiritual sphere (if personal beliefs require it)
Being here and now
1. noticing little pieces every day
2. being mindful of people
3. being mindful of nature
4. being in the “alpha” state, which is a state of silence without unnecessary thoughts
A sense of who you are
1. the ability to answer the questions: What am I? Who am I?
2. consistent, strong subjective sense of self that creates the impression of “I feel good in my skin”, “I feel good in my life”, “I know what I want and need”

Sources of happiness in the future

Having a clear path for the future or accepting not having a clear vision for the future
1. sense of understanding “what will I do in the future” or acceptance and peace of mind in a lack of clarity
2. confidence in “how I can do it” or feeling “everything will work out”
3. peace, despite the thought “I can’t do it, I can’t” or the feeling of confidence “I can do it, I can”
No need to worry too much about
1. your health
2. your finances
No need to worry too much about
1. family
2. health of loved ones
3. relatives’ finances
  And thus the ability to accept what we have no influence on. The ability to trust others and allow them to live up to their values. The ability to talk to loved ones about our concerns, share opinions, but without going “with shoes” into their lives.
Clarity in perception of world order, life, death. Clarity of answers to existential questions or a sense of acceptance in case of no answer:
1. Why does the world exist?
2. Where are we from?
3. What’s after death?
4. What is good and what is bad?
A sense of trust
1. to myself
2. to loved ones
3. life

I wish you with all my heart that there will be as many sources of happiness in your life as possible.

If you think this article is important, please share it with your relatives and friends. Let us not allow depression to become the bane of young and mature people. Let the development of civilization, the development of technology and prosperity go hand in hand with psychological and emotional problems. Let’s take care of ourselves, let’s take care of our loved ones, let’s take care of the balance.

If you are in a difficult moment in your life and you do not know how to deal with your emotions in life, in your family at work, remember that you can take advantage of our help, consultations, coaching and therapy. Email us: [email protected]